You’ve seen this hashtag in countless Instagrams, Facebook posts, and even memes: #RelationshipGoals. We’re all searching for that unrelenting, perfect love in too many ways to count: our family, friends, significant others, pets, and even followers on social media. However, the stories behind these hashtags most likely {most definitely} are NOT perfect, and I’m sure if we knew the inside story, I would dare to say we wouldn’t always want those couples to be the example we are after. We often reach for unrealistic expectations both in ourselves and in one another to find wholeness. Perfect, unconditional love can only be found in our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I will be the first to admit: I’ve made too many mistakes to even count when it comes to the relationships in life. Just off the top of my head: I’ve been too quickly offended, spoken too soon, judged without truly knowing or understanding, or held people to an impossible standard. We are an imperfect people and joining two of us together gets MESSY. However, I do think it is important to have a standard or understanding of what our relationships are supposed to look like. Here are some resources that have helped me gain a better grasp at what God intended for us. Here are your real #RelationshipGoals.
Act Like Men Series: Pastor Joby Martin, Church of Eleven22
Pastor Joby preaches the Gospel and speaks truth unlike any other pastor I’ve ever listened to. {He also makes me think Jesus may have been a redneck, but that’s another story} This series is life changing. Joby has an ability to communicate the Scriptures in an unparalleled way that convicts our hearts of sin and flesh-tendencies, while also guiding us to the grace Jesus so freely gives.
Men- This series acts as an instructional guide to what the God of the Universe has called you to do and who He has called you to be. Throughout the 5 sermons, Joby focuses on 1 Corinthians 16: 13-14 and offers guidance on how to pursue Jesus as you pursue the woman He has for you. Single, in a relationship, engaged, married, it doesn’t matter. You will learn about the distinct honor you have as a man, and it will change your outlook on strength. Watch here!
Women- This series opened my eyes to what I deserve and what I should be looking for. The King of Kings died on a cross for you and me, and He pursues me relentlessly each and every second of the day. No matter the damage that relationships with men has caused you in the past, whether that be a father, a brother, a significant other, a boss, or anyone in between, you will find freedom knowing that there is a man God has chosen for you that will honor you the way He does. And beyond that- not to settle for anything less. Watch here!
Before All Things: In My Marriage: Pastor Joby Martin, Church of Eleven22
Some of you will read the “Marriage” part of the title and FREAK out or think it’s not for you. PLEASE, keep reading!! The Church of Eleven22 is in the midst of a two year discipleship journey called, “Before All Things”. This 12- week sermon series is focused making Jesus Christ Before All Things in every area of our lives. There are 4 subsections: in the church, in my heart, in my day-to-day life, and in my mission. I would highly encourage you to listen to every sermon to truly understand what it means to live with Christ first in your own heart, calling, finances, and family. BUT, because this post is focused on relationships, I am sharing about one sermon in particular.
Joby focuses on Colossians 3:18-19 and Ephesians 5:21-33. He defines what Jesus means by “submitting to your husband” in the correct context and what being a leader truly means. Through hilarious and completely accurate anecdotes, he describes the pitfalls of not only marriages, but relationships. If you’re married, you’ll finish with a renewed hope to honor God by honoring one another in your relationship. If you’re not, you’ll understand the gravity of the calling it is to be husband and wife and better understand how to look for someone to be your partner in it. Watch here!
Single/Dating/Engaged/Married: Ben Stuart, Breakaway Ministries (Now with Passion City Church)
College boys can be depressing. (Sorry, just had to throw that out there! I’m sure some of y’all are very nice boys 🙂 ) My sweet friend, Caroline, introduced me to this ministry and specifically this series.
Ben Stuart goes through each stage of relationships through a series appropriately titled, “Single/Dating/Engaged/Married.” Although a 10-part series may seem daunting at first, I promise you will gain incredible insight into God’s design for a man and woman no matter what stage you fall into. Ben describes what it means to be committed to serving Christ above all else, then honoring God by honoring the son or daughter you’re in ministry with, and eventually, what a high calling it is to be a husband or wife. At the time, Ben was head of Breakaway Ministries at Texas A&M, so the series is somewhat geared towards leading college students in what they will encounter in the next few seasons of life. However, I think everyone has something to gain from each and every message. The Q&A sermon gave me a lot of clarity and explanation on a his vs. hers perspective. {Not to mention, I love the way Jeff and Jourdan worship with Passion and their cute instagrams for their kids, @casesamuel & @aydjohnson} Also, Ben’s sermon on marriage painted the clearest picture of how a marriage is a reflection of Christ and His church. Watch here!
Swipe Right: The Life and Death Power of Sex and Romance: Levi Lusko, Fresh Life Church
Swipe Right book is everything our generation craves, yet doesn’t recognize they need. Levi Lusko lost his young daughter when she was just five years old. But as he so faithfully believes, what the enemy meant for evil, God will use for good. Although the enemy robbed him of being able to teach these relationship lessons to his daughter Lenya, he is committed to sharing the freedom found in Christ Jesus who designed us to want relationships and enjoy them! Levi studied Biblical doctrine in comparison the current hookup culture to debunk the current idea that instantaneous desires are life-giving. This book is so important for a generation wants something so much deeper but doesn’t know where to find it.
For more on this amazing book, check back soon for a full review! To purchase on Amazon, grab it here!
BeLoved Devotional: Jordan Lee Dooley
Jordan has an amazing gift for connecting people and describing raw emotions. Her genuine love for Jesus and the freedom He gives radiates through every post she shares. If you haven’t already, follow her Instagram (jordanleedooley) for gorgeous pictures and relatable messages.
Her downloadable devotional series allows you to explore loneliness, relationships, and the redemption God has for you by journaling and digging into the Word. The devotional is just $10 and is sent directly to your email in a downloadable format. Grab it here!
31 Prayers for My Future Husband/Wife: Aaron and Jennifer Smith
This book is just what it’s title says: 31 prayers for your future spouse. My dear friend Caitlyn gave this book to me for my birthday this year, and it is a game-changer! I know I am guilty of focusing on the end result rather than enjoying the process. This husband and wife team each wrote separate books that walk through the desire to be married, while focusing on the preparation for what that relationship will look like. Instead of rushing the process and staying self-focused, this book has 31, 1-page prayers with challenges and journaling space to allow you to faithfully prepare for your future spouse.
Both are available on Amazon!
Buy 31 Prayers for My Future Wife here!
Buy 31 Prayers for My Future Husband here!
Let me know which you used and what you learned!
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